He was just a small town boy who shouldn't have had a care in the world except to play and grow up happy. Sadly, for Hute, it wasn't so. Born to parents who divorced when he was very young, Hute would quickly see both his Mother and Father remarry others who didn't like him very much. Hute was bounced back and forth between parents and was subjected to years of verbal and mental abuse from both step parents. The problems became so great when Hute visited his Father that it was not uncommon for his Dad to take out his frustrations on him and beat him. His step mother was so horrid that Hute referred to her as the 'Dragon Lady'....but she was far from anything that resembled a real lady. After all, how could a 'real' lady harm a child in any way?
Hute lived a childhood of complete distress and sadness. As if the travelling from one home to the other and the abuse he was subjected to wasn't enough, Hute was sexually abused from the age of eight to fourteen by an older cousin while being looked after by him. Hute should have been able to confide in a parent what was happening to him by the babysitting cousin, but he couldn't. Things got to the point where Hute suffered a broken knee cap and ruptured colon at the hands of this sexual predator. But no one cared about Hute. No one was there for him. Hute was a child growing up alone and abused in the world. As if all of this were not enough for one young man to deal with, Hute was also wrestling with who he was as a person. It was clear in his mind that as he came of age he didn't have the same feelings for women that he felt for men. Hute was gay.
At the age of eighteen Hute left home and for the first time felt the freedom to be himself. This sence of freedom would quickly come with the reality that freedom isn't cheap and surviving costs money. Hute ended up moving back home to his Mothers. Upon discovering that Hute announced that he was openly gay, his Step Dad kicked him out of the house. He moved to another state where he met a gay man, whom he tought was very nice. They lived together and began to build a life until Hute began to notice things about his lover. This man was abusive.
One winter afternoon while hanging Christmas lights on the roof of their house, Hute's lover became angry and pushed Hute off of the roof. Hute hit his shoulders and head on the ground which caused a compression to his spine and the beginning of nerve damage. Hute woke up the next day and could not move his legs and was taken to the hospital. The Doctors would discover that Hute had no reflexes and his eyes would not dialate. Hute was not able to urinate on his own anymore and had to be cathed. After a few months of not being able to urinate, Hute was taught how to cath himself. This was devastating for such a young man in the prime of his life and with so much to offer the world, despite all of the troubles he endured to that point.
Hute was diagnosed with three buldged discs and a herniated disc. The damage to his back also pinched and damaged the nerves which made it impossible for him to urninate on his own anymore.
It was some time later when a nurse at his Urologists office suggested a new procedure for Hute. This procedure is called the InterStim. By this time, Hute had a new boyfriend that cared for him very much and was willing to stand by him as he underwent this new procedure. After the stage one of the InterStim, Hute was able to go to the bathroom for the first time in two years. The emotions and tears flew! Hute's companion stood by him every step of the way. When Hute had the stage two InterStim procedure done, his companion took great care of him, checking the incision and making sure all was working right with the control device.
Hute has begun a new and happier life now. He is able to enjoy living inside of a body that is learning to function right again for the first time since his injury. The change in his life is profound.
Hute gave me permission to share his story on this blog, but if I did I had to make it very clear that he did not want me or any other person to feel sorry for him. Not for his horrid childhood. Not for the abusive lover. Not for the feelings he went through because he was unwanted and unloved growing up. He clearly wants no pity for all that he has been through. Hute is goal driven. He is caring. He is a very giving person. He said that he would not change a thing that he has been through in his past because it all brought him to where he is today and to whom he has become as a human being.
You might have guessed by now that "Hute" is not his real name. I wanted to give him a name befitting the bright light that he is to this world. The name "Hute" means 'star'....and I can think of nothing that shines brighter upon us all than a bright star from above. Hute is a soul who's light shines ever so brightly and can only shine even more because of the InterStim! God Bless you, Hute! God Bless the nurse that suggested the InterStim and for Medtronics and the Dr. that did the procedure. A beautiful life has now become even more bright and beautiful because of all that they did...and there are not enough words to say thank you. And, most of all, thank you, Hute, for allowing me to tell your story!
